I dream that I’m at school and today assignment is watching a Harry Potter movie. During break I meet a girl in the bathroom who’s a bit flirty. She says she likes to shed her own skin, I think nothing of it. We exchange phone numbers. Later that day I see her peeling out her own skin layer by layer and it’s terrifying. I block her number.
Tag: queer things
Town Meetings
I dream that I’m walking downtown holding hands with a girl, she’s tall and her hair is dark. I’m trying to flirt. She says if we ever dated she’d be worried about my mental health. Still she peppers my face and shoulders with little kisses, end eventually gives me a long kiss on the lips.
Then I dream it’s town festival night, I notice in the crowd a group of men wearing Nazi uniforms. Assholes! I yell in their general direction and keep walking confidently, thinking they won’t be able to locate me in the crowd. They find me though, they start following me and taunting me. One squeezes my arm and says I have no muscle. One throws me to the ground. The police arrives and they all run away because they’re cowards.
I Wanted To Touch A T*t, Not Look At It
I dream that my penpal C. is visiting. We get into my parents’ bed and I want to get some kissing and cuddles on, but people keep walking into the room. At dawn we go outside, her plane leaves at 10 and I want to spend these last precious hours together, but neighbors rope us into a birdwatching session instead.
Super Protective Big Sister
I dream that I’m staying at my old schoolmate’s. I briefly wonder why I’m at her childhood house when she’s a grownup and married now, but I decide she must have divorced. Everyone goes to sleep but I’m not tired and the sun is still up, so I sit outside with a book. It’s a beautiful place, there’s fields all around me and a stream murmuring in the distance, I want to take so many pictures tomorrow. A guy filming a nature documentary walks by, I wave at him. A dog sniffs me.
I hear screaming and go inside. My friend’s mom has seen my brother with his boyfriend and she’s spawning homophobic s**t now. I look her in the eyes and say that she disgusts me. I collect my stuff and leave.
Did I Know Her In A Past Life Or What
I dream about a girl attending a 1920s school for young women where everyone is wearing white dresses. She is secretly in love with a school mate, and her young brother is fighting in the war. The morning class takes place in a heated swimming pool with special underwater notebooks, but she’s too lovesick to join. In the evening the school holds a charity event where they sell cooking recipes via telephone, a famous actor arrives and steal the girls’ thunder.
The real Good Place would never
I dream that I’m watching a new episode of ‘The Good Place’. The main character is I wanna say J.D. from Scrubs…? He’s in Paradise and asks to see his ‘nonni’, I’m confused because I thought he was Jewish. We are introduced to his grandparents and also his cousin who really loves trans women. As I watch I’m reading a review about how perfect the episode’s ending is, so I’m very eager as you can imagine. The cousin gets to a castle full of beautiful trans women, we linger on every gorgeous face and impeccable makeup and I’m overwhelmed with joy. In the end the cousin falls for a cis woman though, and that’s absolute horse crap and I’m pissed.
Late, Lost and Unkissed
Dad and I are watching a movie. It’s very experimental, during the opening credits we see the landscape running away as if it was filmed from a car, from a window here and a tree there certain images or words pop up, conveying a dreamy, hopeful mood. Dad is impressed and asks me if I ever saw anything like it. I say no.
The movie begins properly and we are both taken aback to discover it’s not recent, but a vintage one with Sophia Loren speaking a passable English. The scene is set on my house’s balcony and neither of us question that.
My penpal C. has come to visit, but every time I turn my back or move to another room I forget what she looks like, I keep needing to go check again. Eventually I learn that she has short blonde hair and a bit of a plain face (nothing like IRL C.): she looks like a less attractive Saoirse Ronan, but I’m not that pretty either so I think we’re reasonably well-matched. I want to impress her, so I tell her my family has an acting tradition; why, even Sophia Loren filmed in this house! C. likes acting, I reason, hopefully she’ll want to marry me and take my genes, even though we’re both girls and that’s not how it works.
I’m late for school! As I look for my coat she protests out loud. I need to go to these classes, I explain, or I’ll have to repeat the year come September. Her mom is now in the room with us, sitting in an armchair and talking about boys, oblivious to what’s happening. C. gets really, really close and pins me to a wall, I feel her warm breath as she asks me,
“Remember what we did to that donut last year?”
I whisper yes, she asks if I’d like to do that again. “Yes,” I say trembling,”if you want to.” She’s about to kiss me, when I wake up.
I fall asleep again and dream the same dream. Now I’m running to get to school in time, I have to attend at least 70% of my classes and I’m not about to skip them this afternoon. When I arrive though, I realize with horror I’m not in my usual class with the boring philosophy professor, I went to work instead! Except work is a greenhouse miles from where I’m supposed to be, and what’s worse, I’m not wearing any shoes.
Two friends come to the rescue, they are two young men. I get in their car and one of them borrows me his shoes, because we are the same size, don’t I know? I congratulate myself, I’m so smart for remembering such a crucial detail, my narrative skills are on point even when I’m dreaming. We are showed a flashback where the friend buys me a pair of cool shoes, yellow and blue.
The car crosses a bridge, I notice racists graffiti on the walls. I look at the time, it’s almost six and I only have one hour left to not completely waste my evening. Unless… unless I was actually in a coma, in a tank full of red water and electric eels, and I never left the house. I missed school, I’ll never graduate now.
Visiting an Old Friend
IRL I have a penpal of almost 10 years, C. I never met her in person, but in tonight’s dream I go visit her for apparently the second time, I’m on vacation from work and I’m gonna spend a week with her.
She hugs me so tenderly, because after all we’re in love and neither of us will admit it, and she invites me to her school. I watch her play some sort of nerd game, kinda like Quidditch, then we go to class together. I think the lesson is rather easy, we learn about smaller or greater math numbers, but afterwards the teacher says something truly offensive and homophobic and C. and I storm out of the room.
She walks me to her house, where her dad –a man with a truly impressive mustache– hugs me. Her mom and grandma are very lovely and welcoming, they make me olive pizza. I notice there is no drinkable water anywhere in the house, but they have a kitchen cabinet full of alcohol and soda bottles. As we’re eating, another grandmother appears at the table. She’s a ghost, and also she looks uncannily like my mom.
DECADE DREAM JOURNAL 